Celestial Exorcism Preparation


Celestial Exorcism Preparation


Johnny Stitches

Are aliens real? Yes, but that is not the real question here. In fact, it is not as easy as a single question; it’s more like running a brush through tangled, chlorine-soaked hair. Instead, there are real painful questions like: Where do they come from, what are they doing here, and do they really invade us through our dreams? I mean, it’s nothing like the movies made it out to be at all. No space ships, no cataclysmic weapons, no harvesting our planet for its natural resources, and no last great war for humanity's survival. If only it was like that. If only it was widely known and commonly accepted, but sadly it’s not. 

Daniel, my brother, is older than me, but not wiser, not at all. His body let one in. I can’t prove it, but I know that one is inside of him. Once he came home from his first “therapy” session, he was never the same. And you can’t blame it on puberty or “changes” but that’s all mom and dad want to do and he hit that like four years ago. Come on! Gosh, they are so blind. They do not have the strength to do what needs to be done, but I do.

Tonight, he is on a plane coming home from another “trial effort” and our dad left earlier to pick him up. I have heard the word “experimental” from them a lot lately. So I don’t have much time to set everything up. He has been gone for two weeks to Spain again. I’ve never been. I’m kinda jealous, I haven’t even ever been out of Texas. Since his possession, he has been to Spain like 47 times and says it’s the best place he’s ever seen. I don’t know if I can trust his sight though, for his eyes have died. Really! They have more white to their color every time he comes back. And he has scars too!

Anyway, most of my celestial exorcism preparation has been hampered by my parents. Mom is the worst. Doesn’t she see that I am saving him, saving us? I’ve read online everything I need to know. “Are you smarter than a fifth grader?” Most people are not. You have to clear the clouds out of their eyes. Those dream aliens see through us and since one is working within him, Daniel can see more than I can, but I’m gonna fix that. Have you ever heard of a lobotomy? Well, you can perform those with just an ice pick. It’s true look it up! And my exorcism isn’t even as complicated as that.

We had some bad flooding not too long ago and this really cool old rusted serrated knife thingy made its way into our back yard. Luckily I hid it before mom or dad could see it. I know I can use it to remove Daniel’s “star from the face of the sky.” That’s what the man on the internet said anyway. I clicked the link to see how it’s done, but mom’s new child block software has kept me from watching it. She’s so stupid.

Maybe they are in on it? How can they not see all his new scars, hair loss, skin color change, and how weak he has been as 100% proof that he has been invaded by the body-snatching dreamers? These alien cases are all over the internet, for crying out loud. Mom has locked all of the kitchen drawers in attempt to keep the tools I need from my hands, but “ol' rusty” is under my pillow and ready to go.

Oh wait! You hear that the door is opening downstairs? Yes! Dad and Daniel must be back!

“Samuel, your brother is home!” (Mom’s voice from downstairs)

Alright, go time! It’s now or never! Let's do this!

“Ok, Mom! I got something in my room I want to give him.”


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